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We’re spicing things up at the office today with our review of Bishop’s Rondo’s Salaryman!
NSFW CONTENT AHEAD: This is a male castoff figure and you bet there’s gonna be some NSFW content. So proceed with caution, cos there’s some dick pics coming your way 😱 Let’s get to ’em! (≧ 𓎺 ≦)=ъ
As usual, we took all photos shown here and made minimal edits to them; most have been cropped and/or rotated. However, we did not remove any dust, blemishes, or imperfections.
Are you happy to see me, or are you just photocopying your ass again?
Makoto Niizuma, aka Salaryman, is Bishop’s Rondo’s first male character in their lineup of hentai figures. Male castoff figures are quite the rare breed, so we knew we wanted to check this bad boy out as soon as we saw this figure drop.
And dropped it has, much like Makoto’s pants. ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡° )
The design of the figure is based off of an illustration by Hon Toku, a BL mangaka whose affinity for sexy office men has culminated in the published manga series “Office Panther.” If photocopiers and nearly nude men are a combo you can’t live without, “Office Panther” will definitely strike your chords just right!
We definitely noticed some things off the bat, pre-crotch reveal of course. First, Makoto’s skin tone doesn’t seem to match up perfectly; his face particularly stands out. It comes off really pale compared to other parts of his body, like his neck and torso. Someone needs to help this guy color match and blend his foundation ASAP!
And while Makoto’s foundation skills may need some work, his sultry cat eye, fluttering lashes, and soft pink shading look absolutely IG-worthy!
*I could seriously use a YouTube tutorial for this lewk ⊙︿⊙*
Honestly, I could get lost in those eyes and end up forgetting about what he’s hiding under that jacket. But nahhh, we wouldn’t do that to ya. We’ll be getting to that soon. ୧⍢⃝୨
The shading of his hair is nice, going from a richer brown at the roots to a nice light brown at the ends. The seams in his hair are pretty noticeable, but luckily the gradient shading helps to drown that out a bit.
While the front of the show is drool-worthy with those peekaboo bangs, the same can’t be said for the back of his head. There’s a nice layering of the hair parts to add some volume, but much like these two hair parts, something doesn’t sit well here.
The edges aren’t jagged, but the top piece floats just a bit too high above the lower part making the separate pieces really noticeable.
Luckily this isn’t as noticeable from afar, so it’s just some nitpicking. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But that’s not all folks! Another detail we couldn’t help but scrutinize was some of the shading on the shirt. The grey paint used to enunciate the folds of his shirt seemed to give off a more dusty feel than detailed.
But I guess you could argue the shirt’s not where the attention should be focused, so do with this info what you will!
The seams of this figure make another triumphant return, this time by way of sleeves. Maybe this was a conscious fashion decision, à la French seams?
That said, you can’t blame it on the seamstress when it comes to the back of his shirt. Thanks to the shadow, the slight ridge that stretches from armpit to armpit is noticeable, but we’re more concerned about the small chunk missing by his right shoulder.
We’ll chalk it up to a fluke manufacturer defect, but now we can’t help but wonder...what else has this man been doing during work hours to end up like this? ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )
Let’s shift the focus a little further down for now (no, not to that part YET).
Like any fashion-forward professional, Salaryman’s got his silk socks, garters, and sleek leather loafers. If that doesn’t scream sex appeal, what does??
The shading of these accessories is done wonderfully — the mellow gradient of his socks really showcases how they stretch out over his pale skin. Even his loafers’ darker tips ooze sophistication, despite one managing to slip off during his climb to the photocopier’s summit.
The garters didn’t leave us as impressed; the sculpt of the clip really looks like it was smushed onto the band, while the band doesn’t meld well and looks very much like a piece of plastic that was slotted in place.
We’ve seen some more skin-pinching looks on other female figures and wish we could have gotten that nice, body-hugging sculpt with this piece despite its small size.
Getting our faces up close and personal with the part also helped us find a scuff on his knee, probably from manufacturing/packing.
Now, let’s take a look at some of the finer details of the figure. We’re backtracking to the shoes, which again have a nice gradient paint job. The detailed folds of the loafer and the loosely tied strings are a small but appreciated detail!
Even more impressive is his watch — the small buckles and watch face look so great! Just hope his undressing routine’s happening at 11 at night and not a.m. cos that’d be one awkward office lunch…
You might also notice his wedding band on his ring finger, but ethics be damned since we’re gonna be scrutinizing his sack in a bit. ( Ŏ艸 Ŏ)
Makoto’s hands look so delicate, but the camera wasn’t able to pick it up too well. His nails are meticulously manicured and leave me both breathless and feeling embarrassed by the state of my chapped winter hands. · ╥﹏╥ ·
While we’re not at the good part just yet, we will make a small reveal of what lies just beyond the coat…but only to point out there’s no shading on the g-string bow. And yes, we said g-string.
Next up for discussion — the photocopier! The scene of the crime 🕵️♀️
This emblem of the modern day office serves an awesome base for Makoto! Of course, we’ve seen him sitting leisurely on top of it, but this part is worthy of its own look.
The scanner is made of transparent plastic to recreate the real deal. An obvious concern is that this can be scratch-prone, especially since Makoto usually sits right on top of this part.
But the attention to detail in making this part look like its real life counterparts is greatly appreciated, since this part of the machine is usually hidden beneath Makoto’s booty. It’d make a great prop for any figure photo shoots!
*Also shameless plug, but if you wanna check out some awesome figure photography, make sure you follow us on Instagram!*
The lid of the machine is solidly built, but you can’t close it. Understandable since we wouldn’t want the figure to topple off should the lid fall forward.
There were some noticeable scuffs on the photocopier right out of the box, plus the color didn’t match on all the different sections. Maybe to give it that look of use and age since it doesn’t look like some of the more modern models??
Perhaps one of our favorite details on the photocopier was the paper trays! Before you assume we’re just easily impressed, we really want to point out how each tray has been sculpted, with the handles carved out and everything. Of course you can’t open them, but we were honestly expecting the trays to be just stickers or some paint so we have to give credit where it’s due!
Okay guys, we’re almost there! Let’s first just have a quick look at the jacket Makoto uses.
The jacket is sculpted to lay over his lap, crumpling and wrinkling as it sits atop his…ahem. The glossy buttons on the underside of the jacket (well, technically the front) are a nice touch as well!
When you put the jacket on his lap, though, there’s some things that stick out a bit more than just his boner (lol).
The position of his hand and how the jacket sits against it looks a bit odd. Firstly, even with a raging hard-on, the jacket’s fabric shouldn’t look as stiff (LOL) as it does.
The more noticeable thing was if you DO position the coat so that the fabric sits more firmly in his hand. The pictures show it pretty well, but the jacket’s indentation for his leg sits at an awkward angle considering the fixed draping of the fabric.
So depending on where you choose to have the fold of the fabric look more “natural”, you’ll be left with a weirdly angled look at a different section.
Taking a look at the original illustration, you can kind of see how it oversimplifies the original concept.
But, let’s not dwell too much on it because it’s that time! Who cares about the coat itself when we’re about to throw it aside to see what’s been hiding under it this whole time!! Drum roll please!
This is where the NSFW section begins, so don’t say we didn’t warn you!
We know why you’re here and we won’t keep you waiting any longer. Here is Makoto’s plastic peen in all its PVC glory!
If you’re anything like us, you probably clicked this article so you could:
1. See how Bishop’s Rondo’s first male genitalia sculpt came out
2. See how a penis on a figure looks since Barbie dolls never solved that question
3. A combo of A and B
And here it is, folks.
Okay. You’ve surely noticed the cock ring and his g-string ball bag. But stare a little longer and you might notice something seems off…
As in really off. We couldn’t place it right away, but then one of our team members finally asked the key question: “why are his balls so far from his dick?”
Knowing we had our lead, we went full investigative reporter mode. By which I mean, we whipped out another plastic penis for COMPARISON TIME! (~‾⌣‾ )~
Helping us out today is DRAMAtical Murder’s Aoba, courtesy of Native!
Native’s no stranger to the world of castoffs. Just as their name implies, things get naked and creative when they’re involved.
Right off the bat, you can see how much more detailed and anatomically typical the Aoba figure gets. The balls are tucked tightly under his schlong and the added details on his shaft heighten the realism.
To put it simply, that’s an actual peen.
Putting them side by side, you can get a better idea of how the small details make a world of difference. We could easily list some of the most glaring with Aoba: the shading at the base, the wrinkling just under the head — hell, even the penile raphe is engorged and sculpted as such.
But maybe it’s not a fair comparison. There is a clear lack of detail with Makoto — the skin is smoother, the colors are more subdued, and the sculpt just barely distinguishes some key anatomical features — but maybe this is meant to create a more sensual atmosphere, rather than one so hot and heavy. It’s not nearly as in your face as Aoba’s, which I could easily imagine is an appeal for some. This would still obviously clash with some of the more forward aspects of the figure’s pose and background, but thinking back to Makoto’s softer features like his eyes and hands…maybe the appeal is there?
I don’t know where I stand ultimately on the debate, but it’s really up to you to decide if the style matches your preferences and collection.
Also, we ended up with some paint transfer and an unfortunately placed scratch from the coat (ToT)
Maybe we just got too excited for the reveal and whipped it out too fast. (´༎ຶ ͜ʖ ༎ຶ `)
We’re almost done with our review, but there’s just one last thing we wanted to mention: Makoto’s ripped af!
The sculpting of his chiseled abs and firm pecs are subtle but striking in the best way possible. The grooves and texture of the muscles really make up for the not-as-drool-worthy anatomy down under.
You might see that Makoto’s baby blue tie is in the way of the view, but that thing’s just another highlight to point out! The metallic sheen to mimic the glow of the silky fabric is a 10/10 in our books! \( ﾟヮﾟ)/
So, what do we think?
Well, there were definitely some hits and misses for us. Some of the details (or lack thereof) didn’t pack enough of a punch as we had expected. Maybe we had set the bar too high in anticipation of this figure releasing, but it’s important we say that we were still impressed by a lot of things.
Makoto’s character design is unique and almost glamorous despite its more risqué tones. Just as some details disappointed, some also blew us away like the photocopier and Makoto’s shredded abs.
The reality is also that male castoff figures are a rarity at the time of writing. We’re still barely seeing male character releases from some of the bigger names in the game like Native. We hate to say it but it’s slim pickings out there. So while Makoto might not be our #1, he’s not very far down the list.
Of course, what you think of Makoto is the most important because there’s a lot of opinion mixed amongst all the nice photos. Hopefully our review helped you get a better idea of what to expect.
We want to know your thoughts on this figure too — make sure you leave us a comment with your hot take and happy collecting everyone!
Until next time! (。･∀･)ﾉ